Bloodstain on your hands-song attempt

Vrs.1
My heart had been broken
Torn into two
Never again to feel love flowing through
Thought I could handle
Weighed all the costs
Opened myself risking all that I got

Chorus:
Are you happy now
When you see my tears
Knowing all of me I gave you
Was all I had left to give
When you walked away
Without looking back
Did you notice all the blood stains
From the knife you drove in my back

Vrs.2
You told me you loved me
You told me you cared
That no matter what you would always be here
Glued back the pieces
Healed all the scars
Only to shatter what was left of my heart

Chorus:
Are you happy now
When you see my tears
Knowing all of me I gave you
Was all I had left to give
When you walked away
Without looking back
Did you notice all the blood stains
From the knife you drove in my back

Vrs.3
I thought you were perfect
Believed all your lies
Never imagined was just a matter of time
Till you slipped through my hands
Like sand on a beach
I really hope she’s every thing that you need

Break:
I find it hard to breathe without you
I’m on the edge and ready to jump
I only want one time to touch you
But that’s asking far to much

Chorus:
Are you happy now
When you see my tears
Knowing all of me I gave you
Was all I had left to give
When you walked away
Without looking back
Did you notice all the blood stains
From the knife you drove in my back

Your covered in my bloodstains
And you pushed me off the ledge

Stupid me

Your more than a memory
I hear you every day
See your face in all the photos
Words you wrote me haunt my brain
Stay awake so I don’t see you
Cause you visit every dream
Tore down every photo
Lit up all those letters
Turned to ashes every page
Matched your clothes
Watched them burn away
Doesn’t matter if I’m happy
If I’m sad it’s still the same
Feel the tide overwhelming
Pushing every breath out of my lips
It’s getting dark I’m going under
Don’t know which way is up
Panic has riddled my body
Caused my mind to become corrupt
Pulled the blinds down over the windows
Threw my phone against the wall
Desperately seeking a solution
Ignoring all of the calls
Remember how we promised
That we’d love until the end
Broken and shattered is how you left me
I thought you were so much better than him
You made me open my heart up
Something I swore was closed for good
You played me like a puppet
Then burned me like a pile of wood

A hot Friday

Summers here once again,
There’s still no place to rest my head
Still smile that smile they don’t suspect
That my whole entity is a complete fucking mess
I cry behind the doors I lock
I scream at God-I’m the one He forgot
My echoes break the silent void
These blades have turned into some kind of sick toys
Giving up,,sounds easy to do
But it wouldn’t bring me any closer to you
For you’d be in heaven and I’d be in hell
For the sins I’m committing,loosing my mind as you can tell
Running out of options
And the ice is wearing thin
No ones throwing me a lifeline
Nor understands where all I’ve been
I close my eyes it’s all so peaceful
As drops fall on the ground
Only a brief moment of freedom
From the chains which have me bound
Pretend your hearing every word
Make me feel like I’m not alone
And even though my thoughts are slurred
Will you follow me into the unknown
What you see I do not share
I hide it every day
Keep my head down,work sunup to sundown
As my days are slipping away
~~L.R.~~

Changing tides

There’s a space-been erased in my heart that’s hollow
Memories dissipate-can’t retrace or foresee tomorrow
Taken back to the days where our love never knew sorrow
Now your gone-slipped away-there’s no trail to follow

Fought to breathe-left for dead
Yesterday haunts me in my head
Giving up-letting go
Taking back promises I told

I’m almost cutting the rope
Not holding on to false hope
Insatiable is your hold
Can’t reword what’s already told

Incurable disease is eating away my soul
Distressed actions flow forth from what hasn’t been sold
Waiting, biding my time til I’m numb from the cold
Tearing apart the reasons that never were told
Kiss me with your lifeless lips
Let me enter in that void
Fallen off flesh-my hands are stained
Keep me here til I’m destroyed

Hold me down no room to breathe
Carve into my body I won’t scream
Tracks I lay upon and wait for the rattle
No second thoughts turning back now is futile
Empty hollow voids where my eyes use to be
Heightened sense of feeling with my fingers I can see
Parade of fools where are they going
Bound tightly to their cause
If they think that love’s the answer
When they lose it, they will starve
Come undone, forgive the wrongs
Put a crown upon your head
You wear it well, your chest swells
But your living in a cell
A prison without a key
Soon you’ll see- don’t laugh to loud
He’ll come to take your smile
Life’s not fair and you’ll be scared
When the reaper comes to tear
Your castle down
Don’t cry those tears in front of me
I told you all along
Put the words into a rhythm and sang them into a song
So now you want to hear me
Need some advice from me to you?
Then listen up-I’m saying it quick
Don’t blink twice or you will miss

Whispering echoes linger on my ear
His voice, his touch, I can get so very near
The air turns cold yet a fire burns in me
Knowing all that’s left is all there’ll ever be
I cut my hair I cut my arms
Wrap them up gotta hide the harm
Relinquish your claim
It’s dark inside here
I’m convulsing from this anger
I want to remember who I use to be
I need release to be set free
Please don’t be mad
I love you so
No love left for me, that debt I still owe

08/12/13

Return the light you stole from me
Remove the blindfold I cannot see
You left me here to walk alone
You destroyed the place I knew as home
Listened to my silence
knowing there was pain
Haunted every memory
seemed my loss was your gain
Has it been easy
to go off on your own
Was I replaceable
so easy to disown
You promised you’d never leave me
Actually believed I had nothing to fear
You pulled me from the treacherous currant
Just to watch me drown in my tears
You saved me from my own destruction
Emptied the bullets out of my gun
Then gave me over to a slower corruption
Sharpened the blades so they’d pour out my blood
I didn’t want to come here
Knew too well the price that I’d paid
The only thing standing when I lost all before
Was my body without a name
Couldn’t find in the mirror
Any sign I was here
Couldn’t find my way back to this world
Stuck somewhere between here and there
Ink still wet
Words held back
And though your voice is silenced
I can still hear your song
No longer in my arms
Last breath come and gone

Alone

Alone I sit and think
About the days that you were here
Alone I remember
everything i held so near
Don’t cry
it will all aright
Don’t frown
I didn’t mean to bring you down
Withered
just disappearing in front of my eyes
Frightened
of the nothing I feel inside
I won’t go back now
Ill leave the past behind somehow
And leave you there in the wreckage
Ill leave you in the wreckage of my heart
My heart is bruised beyond repair
The scars are fresh
they show no signs of healing
It’s been years and it doesn’t matter
Time holds still
The hourglass is shattered

Silence Broken

Silence broken/ I can hear your voice
It’s just a whisper,yeah, only a little noise
Drivin me crazy/ You wake me from my sleep
Try to forget you,yet, your still in my dreams
Lift up eyes/ Where am I headed now?
Unfamiliar steps moving me backwards somehow
You will not leave/ so I pour you a drink
Time’s not the only thing your killing/tonight your victim is me
Pull me into the memories that would have come to pass
Take me further down the road we traveled/I’m starting to forget
Quench this thirst-even with your poison-you can put this all to rest
Give me something to believe in for I have nothing left
Your name flows easily off these twisted lips
Your beauty never faded/you hold me captive with your kiss
Desperately clinging to hope that isn’t real
Hiding behind my visions reach/the words I utter you steal
Fighting the need to hold you in my arms once more
Cannot break free your hold is evermore
Tearing out the pages from the book you wrote for me
One by one into the fire, I will set my own self free
Tormented in the shadow of the questions never asked
Put my will back on the shelf/where it’s been laying since you left

Poem in the dark

Is there a reason to hold on anymore?
Can there ever be something beyond all this pain?
My eyes have grown dim from the tears I hold in.
I push all aside. I don’t need this again.
I thought, just perhaps, there was beauty still waiting….
Until I began unwinding the noose.
Fire grew closer-I was breathing the fumes.
Seeing your face as you withered away.
I cannot do this.
No, not one single day.
No sleep for the weary.
No love that’s untouched.
By death’s cruel demise,
Caution is a must.
I let go of your memories,
For they only bring pain.
Making sense of this turmoil,
Emotionally, I am drained.
Blocked all your numbers,
I need not to see.
All the hurt you endure.
That’s all caused by me.
I started drifting, endlessly,
Even when I close my eyes.
Your stare haunts me.
Your memories still taunt me.
I want to speak;
To see if anyone is there.
To know if you can hear,
But my words become a puddle on the floor.
Drop by drop escaping my tired eyes,
I don’t know if I’m asleep or awake.
If I’m living or have died.
My heads on the ground.
The pain grows deeper.
My twisted way of thinking,
It is covered in black,
I can’t find my way back.
The birds have started singing.
So, I know I am not dreaming.
Another day to aimlessly travel;
Forging a life that is not my own.
No one knows.
I lie.
Hold tears inside,
No hero comes for me.
I must save myself.
But, I can hardly breathe.

Changing tides

There’s a space-been erased in my heart that’s hollow
Memories dissipate-can’t retrace or foresee tomorrow
Taken back to the days where our love never knew sorrow
Now your gone-slipped away-there’s no trail to follow

Fought to breathe-left for dead
Yesterday haunts me in my head
Giving up-letting go
Taking back promises I told

I’m almost cutting the rope
Not holding on to false hope
Insatiable is your hold
Can’t reword what’s already told

Incurable disease is eating away my soul
Distressed actions flow forth from what hasn’t been sold
Waiting, biding my time til I’m numb from the cold
Tearing apart the reasons that never were told
Kiss me with your lifeless lips
Let me enter in that void
Fallen off flesh-my hands are stained
Keep me here til I’m destroyed

Hold me down no room to breathe
Carve into my body I won’t scream
Tracks I lay upon and wait for the rattle
No second thoughts turning back now is futile
Empty hollow voids where my eyes use to be
Heightened sense of feeling with my fingers I can see
Parade of fools where are they going
Bound tightly to their cause
If they think that love’s the answer
When they lose it, they will starve
Come undone, forgive the wrongs
Put a crown upon your head
You wear it well, your chest swells
But your living in a cell
A prison without a key
Soon you’ll see- don’t laugh to loud
He’ll come to take your smile
Life’s not fair and you’ll be scared
When the reaper comes to tear
Your castle down
Don’t cry those tears in front of me
I told you all along
Put the words into a rhythm and sang them into a song
So now you want to hear me
Need some advice from me to you?
Then listen up-I’m saying it quick
Don’t blink twice or you will miss

Whispering echoes linger on my ear
His voice, his touch, I can get so very near
The air turns cold yet a fire burns in me
Knowing all that’s left is all there’ll ever be
I cut my hair I cut my arms
Wrap them up gotta hide the harm
Relinquish your claim
It’s dark inside here
I’m convulsing from this anger
I want to remember who I use to be
I need release to be set free
Please don’t be mad
I love you so
No love left for me, that debt I still owe

Stay with me

Stay with me
Sleep every night in my bed
Stay with me
Devote yourself to the love that we had
I was wrong now I see it
You deserve more
This I believe in
But I’m selfish
I went to extremes
Wanted to see If you believed in me
But you ran like the others
When my scars were uncovered
When the truth became muddled
Inside of me
Why did I meet you
If not to love you
To try to trust you
You don’t know how that was all I had left to give
I keep on forgetting
You’ve moved on I was nothing
Holding on to the normal
Splash my face with cold water
Another night with no sleep
I’m like a drone but with a face
I can’t become what you need
I can’t provide something you’ll keep
Just knock me down
I’m better on my knees
Stains on my wrists remind me I still bleed
Fighting with ghosts
Speaking to spirits
Just leave me alone
Just let me be
I don’t want this part of you
And you don’t understand
Burning incense in my room
Burning desires in my bed
I cannot seem to shake you
Your always in my head
Doctors fill me up with pills
Drown my sorrows like all the others do
The poison is taking a toll on me
It’s blurry I can hardly see
Take your hands off my neck
I can hardly breathe
You’ll likely be the death of me